August 1, 2025
The Naked Gun
One movie, three cups.
Screened at Regal Cinemas, Rancho Mirage, California I wasn't looking forward to this originally, what seems technically to be the third sequel in The Naked Gun franchise (i.e. not a remake). From the start, I was on the side of Liam Neeson being a good choice to play Frank Drebin Jr, whose father was Lt. Frank Drebin, played by the late-in-life comedic genius Leslie Nielsen. I just wasn't hopeful anything could come close to equalling the comedic genius ZAZ (David Zucker, Jim Abrahams, Jerry Zucker) displayed in their classics Kentucky Fried Movie (1977), Airplane! (1980), Top Secret! (1984), and 1988's The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad! (and it's genius origin series, Police Squad!; why I am just now realizing how often they used exclamation points in their titles?). They were also involved in its two sequels (2½ and 33⅓) but not in equal measure. I also wasn't expecting it to come close to Airplane II: The Sequel, which ZAZ had absolutely nothing to do with, and yet in my opinion still measured up, if not in originality, but in tone and humor.
The trailer comes out, and I'm still not convinced, but I was willing to give it a shot. Then the reviews start coming in, not just from critics, but from audiences, and they're pretty solid. So while I was still reluctant, I was willing to check out what the fuss was about. Admittedly, something about Neeson and co-star Pamela Anderson being an off-screen couple as well as on-screen, endeared me to it. Unfortunately, from the start, there were warning signs. The first that made me feel that "OK, yeah, this is a dud" was the first of three involving cups. Hence: 1 movie, 3 cups. It's as simple as Drebin walking into a lobby area of some sort, with a front desk. There is a cup that he naturally grabs, part of the film's ever-repeating joke about cops drinking coffee at alarming rates (no donut jokes, I guess those are too tired?), and low and behold it's not a cup of coffee, but a cup for tips. He tries to drink it, and starts to swallow coins. Cue the crickets. There's another joke shortly thereafter about a bartender cleaning a cup, and when he puts it down, the towel he's using continues to clean the cup all on its own. OK .... I guess? Then another, where Drebin orders a sparkling water at a nightclub, and out the waitress comes with a tonic water, with a lit sparkler in it. Insert facepalm.
Listen, this wasn't terrible per se. Liam Neeson wasn't bad in the role. Neither was Pamela Anderson, and they both had good chemistry together. The problem is, Neeson just wasn't naturally funny. He was deadpan as others have observed, which made him a good fit in that sense, but his predecessor Leslie Nielsen had this way of letting the audience know he was both aware, AND unaware there were jokes going on around him. That portrayal made him confused and made us connect with him more. With Neeson, it felt like he wasn't in on the joke to any extent, thus taking away the chance for laughs to flourish.
Other warning signs included the film having three writers. Yes, the original had FOUR writers, but that original ZAZ trio was lightning in a bottle. Generally, multiple writers means something isn't working, and that was on display here. They get the spirit of the franchise, no qualms there, but the humor? Comedy gold was not struck here. Another bad sign, though late in the film, Priscilla Presley shows up, but even though she takes up the full screen, its a "blink and you'll miss it" moment. All the more baffling, she does nothing but sit there for a second, and her moment is over. So brief that I made it my mission to stay through the credits to at least see if that really was her. A final example is even the fake credits during the end scrawl were rather weak. "On set dressing"? Yeah, you know where that goes. Sigh.
Did I laugh? I had one good solid, but quiet, more under my breath type of laugh. And then two other times I let out one of those barely audible "heh" sounds. Not even laughs, really.
Listen, the humor may hit for you; perhaps this was somehow not for me. It's technically proficient, so I can't really say to avoid this. But if ZAZ were your jam all these years, my guess is this will be a letdown for you. It felt like, any of those bad spoof movies from the 2000s such as Vampires Suck, Disaster Movie, Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday the 13th or yes, 30 Nights of Paranormal Activity with the Devil Inside the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.
They say the jokes come at you at a rate of one minute or less. Sure, but those jokes need to be funny, not weak. The energy and enthusiasm is there, but that's only gets you half way there.
